Love in a time of Chaos


It’s almost Valentine’s Day. Do you have plans?

My daughter who is single came up with a fun idea. Gather your closest single girlfriends, get all dressed up and go out to a fancy dinner and celebrate your freedom. I love it!

If you are in a relationship grab your honey and celebrate your love!

In Marin County (one of the most expensive places on the planet to live) a lot of us are running around like chickens with our heads cut off just trying to keep up with the bills. Keeping up with the Jones in Marin County is next to impossible when many of the Jones are millionaires so I’m content just keeping up with my bills and thankful for my job that offers medical benefits (and an amazingly beautiful commute at sunrise each day). Also in Marin many of us are married with children. All of this combined does not leave much time to celebrate your love with the one you love. You are lucky if you pass him/her in the hallway while heading out the door to your job/kid’s soccer/grocery store/networking event/PTA meeting/gym/therapist/etc…

Two of my favorite relationship expert friends agree on the importance of making time for date night! Here is what they have to say:

“Family stability starts from the top which is why it’s important for couples not to forget to prioritize their relationship.  With kids, work,obligations and the general mayhem of life, it’s very easy to forget to work on the connection and bond.  Ways for couples to do this can take many forms; dinner, walks, picnics, roller skating, coffee dates and kid-free overnights.  The important piece is the uninterrupted alone time, where communication, intimacy and loving attention to each other can occur.” ~Lisa Kift, MFT

“We always recommend that couples prioritize their relationships. When they are dating or engaged, that means carving out time to have fun together…Especially if they are busy working, studying or wedding planning. When couples are married-with or without children- Having fun together is essential for relationship satisfaction and longevity.” ~ Dr. Michelle Gannon

My extended family is going through some very challenging times right now. It’s easy to get caught up in the stress and forget everything else. I’m currently living under the motto of “one day at a time”. Most of my free time is now spent in therapist offices and soon al-anon meetings.  In case you’re wondering why my blogging has slowed down a bit… I haven’t figured out away to put a spin on the family therapy meetings in a blog post while still maintaining the privacy and respect of said family members. So I’ll leave it vague for now…

Despite all the challenges happening around me with the one’s I love, this week was Celia’s birthday and Valentine’s Day is coming up. During my lunch break last week, I wandered aimlessly around San Francisco in kind of a foggy daze wondering what would be a good gift for Celia. I happened upon the outside market in front of the ferry building at The Embarcadero on Market Street. I weaved my way through the artist’s booths when I noticed a booth full of beautiful paintings with hearts. The artist smiled at me and said which one do you like. I was drawn to one that had a big heart in the center of what looked like a bunch of chaos. When I got closer the chaos was words written in English and Spanish words like love, amor. When I saw this, I knew it was the right gift. It showed that love prevails in the middle of chaos and it was also in Spanglish! (The language of my home!)

This blog post is just a friendly reminder to make some time for the ones you love whether they are your spouse, boyfriend, girlfriend, child, parent, best friend or a neighbor or even your dog! 😉

Happy Valentine’s Day!

PS. The Marin Happy Hour TweetUp at Pacific Catch is this Thursday, 2/17/11! If you are in the area stop by and say hi. All are welcome (even if you don’t tweet!) More info here:

2 thoughts on “Love in a time of Chaos

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *