Somebody to share my innermost thoughts


gary“TRIGGER WARNING- This blog post contains information about suicide which may be upsetting to some people.”

Because of the dude on the left of this photo… every year on November 22, I listen to the song Somebody by Depeche Mode, over and over. I put the song on repeat and I spend time reflecting on the life and the death of my high school boyfriend, Gary.

I have been doing this for 29 32 years. To be honest, I think more about his death than his life because his death had a huge impact on my life. He died from suicide when I was 17 years old.

Just a reminder to you all that you can‘t take anyone for granted (even those who voted for the other candidate) because there is no guarantee they will be here tomorrow. A lesson I learned at a very young age thanks to Gary. 

The reason I listen to the song Somebody is because Gary wrote the lyrics in a note to me before he took his own life.

The lyrics are about someone wanting somebody to connect with. It seems it is about a young man feeling lonely and isolated. Gary wrote those lyrics in a note telling me that is what he wanted from me. It was a cry for help, he was feeling socially isolated.

Listening to this song over and over again for the 29th 32nd year makes me feel grateful for my job at Beyond Differences. Our mission is to end social isolation.

I know the current state of affairs in this country are inspiring people to donate to organizations doing good work. Today In 2016, someone wrote this about our org:

“The tiny staff at Beyond Differences works tirelessly on a very small budget to provide free backpacks and Activity Kits filled with curriculum and tools to bring programs to students across the nation. They’ve engaged over 1,100 schools in No One Eats Alone Day – a day that encourages students to sit with new people and reach out to peers. They’ve organized Know Your Classmates Day to provide powerful curriculum that addressed Islamophobia and biases toward children of immigrant parents in more than 600 schools. They’ve built a strong Teen Board that leads this movement for kindness”*

*updated on 11/22/19 to say as of today over 6000 schools across the US have participated in one or more of our Positive Prevention Initiatives and we just released the results of a year-long study showing how student leadership can help end social isolation!

As stated above, we are a tiny staff with a giant goal and we need more financial support.

If you are so inclined please consider making a donatation via our website by clicking here.

Thank you. I’m going back to listening to Somebody a few more times. 

The lyrics to the song Somebody…

I want somebody to share
Share the rest of my life
Share my innermost thoughts
Know my intimate details
Someone who’ll stand by my side
And give me support
And in return
She’ll get my support
She will listen to me
When I want to speak
About the world we live in
And life in general
Though my views may be wrong
They may even be perverted
She’ll hear me out
And won’t easily be converted
To my way of thinking
In fact she’ll often disagree
But at the end of it all
She will understand me
I want somebody who cares
For me passionately
With every thought and
With every breath
Someone who’ll help me see things
In a different light
All the things I detest
I will almost like
I don’t want to be tied
To anyone’s strings
I’m carefully trying to steer clear of
Those things
But when I’m asleep
I want somebody
Who will put their arms around me
And kiss me tenderly
Though things like this
Make me sick
In a case like this
I’ll get away with it

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